12 March 2010

Buylingual

And the status idiocies roll on...

From something called the Lexington Institute, a self-defined poster child for oxymoron, comes this...What? Oh, you want proof of My claim? Okay. Here's a quote from their own Mission page:


"By promoting America's ability to project power around the globe we not only defend the homeland of democracy, but also sustain the international stability in which other free-market democracies can thrive.

The Lexington Institute believes in limiting the role of the federal government to those functions explicitly stated or implicitly defined by the Constitution."


Uh, projection of power--by your own definition requiring military might--was not something the Founding Fathers put into the Constitution. If anything, they were largely isolationists, avoiding any system that would require getting involved in "foreign wars." If the poopyheads at the Lexington Institute for the Criminally Dense were able to read a history book, they'd learn something. Finally.

But that's just in general. In specific, the doodooheads at the Lexingtom Institute for the Mentally Impaired have released a study titled "Statehood for Puerto Rico and the Potential Fiscal Impact of Official Bilingualism for the United States." It could easily have been subtitled "The Darkies Are Coming! The Darkies Are Coming!"

The 20-page roll of toilet paper basically argues against statehood for Puerto Rico by stating it would potentially cost the U.S. of part of A. about $25.7 billion a year to be "officially bilingual," or "about $85 per American."


Uh, didja include Us in the calculation? We are "Americans" too, Lexington Insititute of the Consistently Incontinent.

By sidestepping the mind-numbing complexity of calculating how much statehood would siphon from the Treasury--but still pointing out that We have a median income of 1/3 the national average--the Lexington Intitute for the Learning Disabled throws out some verbal diarrhea about how "costly" adding Spanish to the nation's "official-but-not-official" English-based system would be.

It's all pure bullshit. Or in terms some if Us can read and understand: Eso es pura mierda.

That the Lexington Institute for the Shitty-Brained tries to frame the anti-statehood debate on "the evils of bilingualism" is a clear example of the witless trying to outhink themselves and merely exposing their biases for all to see. The witlessness is based on three obvious mistakes:

1) That knowing and using one language is better than knowing and using 2 or more.

2) That the addition of another language has not happened at the government level, when as Florida, Texas, California, New York, New Mexico. Arizona, New Jersey and other states can attest, it's been going on for a long time.

3) That $25.7 billion is a cost too high to pay. Here's a thought: Stop the criminal Iraq War and you can save enough to pay for 13 years of "bilingualism" in the first year of peace alone.

No, the Lexington Institute for the Morally Defective doesn't give a rat's ass about the money: their objection is Us. Us as a people, who by and large speak Spanish and many if Us speak English, too. Their objection is that We are poor, not "like them" and thus must be barred from the "heavenly" status of statehood.

Do tell.

Statehood is never--never--going to happen for Puerto Rico because of this gut-level rejection factor. No, one language is not better than two and pretending otherwise, to the ridiculous extent of faking a "study" as "proof" of this idiocy is the act of morons who lack the moral fiber to express themselves clearly.

So in the proper spirit of bilingualism, an advantage not bought and paid for by condescending pricks pretending to be idealists, I close this post with some words for the Lexington Institute of the Cowardly Biased: Sáquense la cabeza del culo, hagan que sus madres se la limpien con la lengua y Bésenme el bicho, cabrones.

Google Translate that, Lexington Institute bitches.


The Jenius Has Spoken.

P.S. From The Guardian Weekly: Learning another language increases thinking skills. Duh.

[Update; 30 April 2010: Take a look at this piece from the conservative-leaning New American. Note the overall tone of the writing and also note how, at the end, it makes becoming " a bilingual country" a negative. Two things, "New American": The U.S. of part of A. has no legally official language and the fact that I and many of My Brethren know two while you barely manage one puts Us one up on you. Cabezas de mierda es lo que tienen ustedes.]

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Querido primo:

Simplemente "genial". Digno del "Genio". Sigo lamentando que tus escritos no sean en español para que pongan a pensar a muchos más. Yo he traducido algunos sin tu permiso para algunos conocidos, pero tu estilo inigualable es díficil de traducir.

Liliana

Gil C. Schmidt said...

Bueno, Prima Querida, puede que haga algo en español en un futuro cercano. Por el momento, mil gracias y espero que nos Veamos pronto.

Prometeo said...

English or Spanish you are still a Genius.

So, does this institute has any influence in Washington politics?

Ever since Pierluisi's attempts to push a pro-statehood plebiscite for Puerto Rico in Washington these types of editorials are becoming more common.

Davsot said...

I love your blog. A lot. So glad I found it.


Do you have twitter?

Gil C. Schmidt said...

Prometeo, I think the Lexington Institute for the Anal-Brained has the same level of influence Pee Wee Herman had on the sale of condoms.

Davsot, you can find me on Twitter as Gil The Jenius. Consistent, I am.

Thanks for dropping by, folks!