07 July 2010

Laugh and Curse

Two items that dropped in front of Me within seconds of each other:

Item the First: One of Our senators, Antonio Soto, hired a local TV "model/hostess" known for having a backside you can balance a gin-and-tonic on, to work in his office. At Our expense. And then he "defends" the decision for hiring her on her physical attributes rather than on any possible intellectual or professional qualifications.

You think it's a joke, right? One, that "Tone the Bone(head)" would actually hire a "model" as an aide and two, that he would then admit he hired her for her ass and not her intellect. And you would point out that he was on a radio morning show known more for idiocy than wit, so he was "just playing along," so it is a joke. Right?

Wrong. She's on the payroll. Our payroll. As a hunk of flesh most likely serving a senator's pubic interest than anything remotely related to the senator's public interest. Blithering imbeciles--otherwise known as "statehood supporters"--will no doubt claim that their man from the District of Guayama can hire anyone he wants. No, he can't. He works for Us and his job isn't to facilitate his sex life. With Our money.

If this prick can't keep his pecker in his pants, then he should join the Tiger Woods Alliance for Skank Therapy and leave Us entirely out of the equation.

Oh, and as for the model, I'd say the difference between her and a street whore is merely the periodicity between payments.

Item the Second: Joke in My Inbox as I finished listening to what prompted Item the First. A near-perfect antidote to the rising flood of abject stupidity We see every day from Our government.

A government employee visits a farm and talks to the owner, an elderly gentleman. He tells the farmer that he wants to inspect the farm's water wells. The gentleman says he can do that, but to please not enter the distant fenced-in area.

The employee grabs his I.D. and says "Listen, old man, I'm the chief authority in my agency and this I.D. right here says I can go ANYWHERE, on ANY property to do ANYTHING I want to with NO restrictions, NO questions and not have to give ANY answers! You got that? You want me to explain that to you again?"

The gentleman shrugged his shoulders and walked off. Several minutes later, he hears terrified screams and rushes over to the fenced-in area. The government employee is running desperately from a raging, long-horned bull. The man's screams rise in volume as the bull gains on him. "HELP ME!! HELP ME!!" 
The gentleman cups his hands around his mouth and yells back: "The I.D.! Show 'im the I.D.!!"

The Jenius Has Spoken.


Prometeo said...

That legislator denied he ever said what he said on the morning show. Either he has short memory or he thinks that people can't listen to other stations that record their programs. He was talking in WKAQ to Normando Valentín telling him that Falú from Notiuno was smearing his name by saying that he hired Yadira for her big butt.

GCSchmidt said...

I wonder how stupid a person has to be to say something into a microphone and then deny s/he ever said it. In this day of Internet instant recall and digital media everywhere, you not only have to be stupid, you have to believe OTHER people are just as stupid. (Not limited to local politicos: Berlusconi would be the Italian poster child for this malady.) And what's worse: some OTHER people ARE as stupid. And they vote.