23 May 2007

Joint Irrelevance

Let's see...

Stupid Rosselló is a candidate for governor in his shellacked, shell-shocked and hell-bound party.

Got that one.

And Puerto Rico's bonds were downgraded--again--to less than BBB status. Yep, got that one right, too.

Let's deal with the failure first. Stupid Rosselló primped and preened his sorry self in a grotesque version of a whore impersonating a virgin pretending he wasn't "in the race" for governor. Poppycock. As predicted--not only by Me, I must add--the party poopheads "acclaimed" him until, in a show of reluctance as believable as weapons of mass destruction in Baghdad, Stupid Rosselló accepted the party's "plea."

With a condition: He would not run a primary campaign. That's like being a horse's ass in the Kentucky Derby: You're there, but you aren't actually running in the race.

I say We let him be a horse's ass because he simply reveals he is a cowardly horse's ass. At a time when Puerto Rico needs solutions and progressive vision, Stupid Rosselló shackles a party to non-progress and childish posturing. And there are those among Us who believe this horse's ass can walk on water. I say he can prove it...in My toilet.

And speaking of toilets and down the drain and floating crap: Our bonds. A friend argued that I'm not entirely right because they haven't been classified as "junk" by either Standard & Poor's or Moody's. But if the lowest "acceptable" rating for a bond is BBB and you go down to BBB-, would you call that a sideways move from "near junk" to "pretty near junk"? The rating doesn't matter a whit. What does matter is that last year, The Fools were all over the airwaves shrieking "junk bond doom" and how the --wait for it!--sales tax would keep Us from falling into that horrible horrible hole.

Well, We're in the horrible hole, We have a sales tax and Stupid Rosselló is still hanging on, the "not there" governor and the "not there" senator is now the "not there" candidate, joining Our "not there" bonds in joint irrelevance.

I'm far from the only one wishing The Fools, the hole, the Stupid and the junk bonds were "not here."

The Jenius Has Spoken.

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