The Larva Gives Us Cancer

Doctor comes up to you and says "You have cancer." Serious news with deep and far-reaching implications and you feel...something. Sadness, fear, rage, desperation, need, hope, doubt...

Doctor comes up to you and says "The guy next to you has cancer." Be honest: you don't really care, not that much. Not as much as if it were you that got the diagnosis. Not unless the guy next to you is your father, son, brother, best friend...something like that. Otherwise, you react with a bland "Okay" and move on.

Be honest: it's what most of Us would do.

But what about the person to whom the doctor says "You have cancer" and that person says "Okay" and continues his moseying along unperturbed. Deluded? In deep denial? Stupid? Insane? Any of those would apply, but you wouldn't think the person was "right in the head," would you?

Let Me introduce the pitiful excuse for a (non)governor ("Long May He Waffle And Duck Eggs!") Luis "The Larva" Fortuño, he of the pencil-neck geek physique and equally-pathetic intellectual muscle. The Larva has reacted to the downgrading of Puerto Rico's bonds--that his (non)administration used to shove Us into Our deepest debt ever--with a terse "No big deal." This after crowing like an emasculated rooster that Our bonds had "reached their highest rating in 35 years."

For the uninformed, known around here as "statehooders," downgrading a bond means it is a riskier investment and in order for it to be held or sold, a higher interest rate has to be paid. In short, the downgrading is going to cost Us--not The Larva--a ton of money. A $16 billion tumor is now metastasizing and he can't give a fuck.

But even a nano-brained parasite like The Larva has the basal instinct of needing to feed, so his public "Don't give a shit" stance isn't echoed by actions. To wit:

--The Puerto Rico Electrical Power Authority (abbreviation: DILDO) is doing everything in its power (yeah, "power") to keep its fuel surcharge high in order to keep supporting the massive bond issues it has made during this (non)administration. However, political reality means they've announced a "rate drop" for September...in time for the elections.

--The IVU Loto, a lottery based on your numbered sales tax receipt, is desperately trying to bolster its declining revenue by offering a car and 6 iPad giveaways every week. The bonds Moody's downgraded are exactly these (based on the sales tax revenue), and the downgrade was hinted at over four months ago.

Our debt equals Our Gross Domestic Product. That means We owe as much as We "make". If that were you, you'd be paying debts with every dollar you earn. Does that sound like a healthy arrangement to you?

If it does, you are too stupid to breed and should be euthanized.  Pity We didn't do that to The Larva back in 2008...because he isn't going to be paying anything for the cancer he's unleashed on Us.


The Jenius Has Spoken.


[Update: 23 July 2012: In this NotiCel article, it seems likely that Our government budgets in the near future will pay more in debt service than what it will invest in health and education. So now Our government is pretty much like many of Our families, paying off loans and interest from overspending and thus incapable of paying a medical plan or sending kids to something other than wretched public schools. The difference? Our families are ALSO paying for this government debt. I have to repeat this: the only good politician is a dead one. The sooner We make more good ones, the better.]