27 November 2009

Black (Humor) Friday

According to some lamebrain Newsweek writer, none other than Our very own lamebrain excuse for a (non)governor, Luis "The Larva" Fortuño, is an "absurdly premature" name on the list of potential Republican Presidential candidates for 2012.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAAAhahahahahahahahahaHAHHAhahahaha

"Absurdly"!!!

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHhahahaahahahahahahHAHAHAhahahaha

Fortuño-Palin for 2012?! One massacres English with a hokey accent and the other is The Larva.

HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAhahahahahahaahahAHHAHAHAhahahhahaha

Fortuño-Palin for 2012?! Are they gonna arm wrestle for the Oval Office? Palin'll kick The Larva's ass.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAahahahahahahaHAHAHahahahahahHA

On an economic note more in tune with the day after stuffing turkey and stuffing oneself with said stuffed turkey, a turkey of a former NPP representative by the unlikely name of Nelson Del Valle (Nelson of the Valley...of the Dolls?) reported that $101,200 in cash was stolen from his home.

HAHAHAHAAHHahahawhatthe fuck?!!

One hundred one thousand two hundred dollars? In freaking cash?!? And, uh, Mr. Turkey Valley, why did you have said amount of cash in your house?

"My mom gave it to me."

HAHAHAHAHahahahaHAHAHAHhahahahasmellslikealie

Really, Mr. Turkey Valley? Your mommy--haha--gave you--HAhahaha--more than--HAHAHAHAhahahaha--one hundred thousand--HAHAHAHAHAahahahahHAHAHA--dollars? HAHAHAHAHAahhaahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA

In cash? HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAsnort

Or maybe it was an absurdly premature campaign contribution to "Fortuño-Palin 2012".

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

The Jenius Has Spoken. 

2 comments:

The Insider said...

Fortuno as a Republican Presidential candidate is a fantastic idea Gil!

Why? Because (a) he won't win the spot, but (b) it will bring him and Puerto Rico under much closer scrutiny from the outside.

Gil C. Schmidt said...

Hadn't considered that...Glad I thought about it! My ideas are SO spot on!