According to some lamebrain Newsweek writer, none other than Our very own lamebrain excuse for a (non)governor, Luis "The Larva" Fortuño, is an "absurdly premature" name on the list of potential Republican Presidential candidates for 2012.
Fortuño-Palin for 2012?! One massacres English with a hokey accent and the other is The Larva.
Fortuño-Palin for 2012?! Are they gonna arm wrestle for the Oval Office? Palin'll kick The Larva's ass.
On an economic note more in tune with the day after stuffing turkey and stuffing oneself with said stuffed turkey, a turkey of a former NPP representative by the unlikely name of Nelson Del Valle (Nelson of the Valley...of the Dolls?) reported that $101,200 in cash was stolen from his home.
One hundred one thousand two hundred dollars? In freaking cash?!? And, uh, Mr. Turkey Valley, why did you have said amount of cash in your house?
"My mom gave it to me."
Really, Mr. Turkey Valley? Your mommy--haha--gave you--HAhahaha--more than--HAHAHAHAhahahaha--one hundred thousand--HAHAHAHAHAahahahahHAHAHA--dollars? HAHAHAHAHAahhaahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA
In cash? HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAsnort
Or maybe it was an absurdly premature campaign contribution to "Fortuño-Palin 2012".
The Jenius Has Spoken.